I think a lot about time, motherhood, enjoying every moment, the typical things that run through the minds of so many mothers and people striving to make the most of every moment. Something I probably shouldn’t overthink too much actually. While I was nursing Maeve this morning in her nursery Anna was helping out by putting away all Maeve’s clean diapers that were hanging on the drying rack. Of course it was taking her forever and became more of a game than anything else. (I’m actually quite thankful she thinks cleaning up and helping is so fun even if it takes her a long time) I was sitting there thinking how sweet this little scene was. How we know all too well those are the sorts of little moments that we will carry with us forever.
So why am I so often in a hurry? I want to get things done fast. I especially find this to be true with household tasks. Laundry, dishes, household cleaning, yeah I want to get those done, and no one better get in my way! Ask me why I need to get things done quickly? Umm I’m not sure, most of the time it isn’t because I have somewhere to be! I am currently reading One Thousand Gifts by Ann Voskamp. If you have read it, then you know the emphasis on being in the moment and offering thanks for all the little things. If you haven’t read it, it is beautifully poetic book, with lots of lines and lessons to meditate on. It has made me really appreciate exactly where I am in life right now. That being said, I have been sharing some of my reflections on it with my mom and mother-in-law and what they offered in response is just perfect! Of course the goal is to enjoy and offer thanks for each and every moment of this life we have been given, and I am going to continue to strive to do so, to slow down and to be present. However, the wisdom from the two women and mothers in my life who influence me so much was that no one has a perfect balance, and that there are times where the hope of the future or having something to look forward to, is what helps us get past some trials in life. Because let’s be real there are some moments we want to be over. Some of these things times are even borne out of waiting for something exciting. Many such times from my life come to mind:Counting down days til we saw each other when my husband and I were still dating and were doing the long distance thing, waiting in excitement to be married during our engagement, our basement flooding and a pipe bursting all within a week of each other during our first winter in our house while I was pregnant then dealing with repairs that took 5 months, awaiting the birth of our children, working part-time (with strange hours) and little money while my husband went through the fire academy, washing dishes by hand for months when our dishwasher broke and we couldn’t repair it (actually got used to it, but thankful to have a working dishwasher now), and so many other things. These are all very normal things that happen and I completely acknowledge that we are not alone in many of the things listed, but they are trying in the moment nonetheless. Everyone’s struggles differ and for others it may be a deep grief born out of a trial I cannot even begin to comprehend. It is a simple my idea, this holding on to hope, but I think hope is an amazing virtue to grow in. Hope is why I love my children and family so fiercely. It is the hope I hold for them in my heart that makes me want to pour so much of myself out whether I am watching a simple day unfold or holding on to the hope of things to come, it is what drives this unflinching love.
We are currently holding out for a big family beach trip at the end of June. I almost feel guilty for writing that, because so many don’t have the luxury of a vacation from a hectic life. My husband and I were recently talking about the psychology of survivor’s guilt, and I think it is similar to always feel guilty for our blessings. Instead we should overflow with thankfulness for everything we have and turn our thoughts and actions toward service and love. Speaking of thankfulness, I’m super thankful for that husband of mine for always challenging me to grow in new ways. Also working on intentionally living to enjoy every moment while waiting in hope for all that the future holds. Lately I’m thinking that means to go easy on myself and to enjoy the task at hand rather than to focus on the time it takes to accomplish tasks. That goes for all the big philosophical questions about what I am supposed to be doing with my life, to scrubbing bathrooms, to potty training. Somehow I have a feeling my kid will not still be using diapers when she’s twenty so, it will all work itself out in time. I have hope for all of these things.
ON A RELATED NOTE:
I wanted to link to couple of blog posts that I have read recently that seem to sum up some of the feelings I have. I have so many thoughts when it comes to social media and how we use it and it has been hard for me to start writing this blog and to sometimes post things. Since I am doing it for myself there is a little less pressure than those that use it as their business. I teeter on this weird line of being authentic, but do I really want to share everything especially in regards to my children (pictures and such). Still trying to navigate what is comfortable and right for me. It seems like pictures of family life bring so much joy to so many and I’d like to think that is a very good thing. Anyway it’s just comforting to know there are so many women who desire so many of the same things for their life and can express it so beautifully! I seriously read most of their posts nodding my head while saying, “yes! uh huh! yes!” the entire way through.
This one from Carrots for Michaelmas – Haley (it’s her blog) shared it from her archives recently on her blog’s Facebook page. I adore all of her posts and share her love of Jane Austen and period dramas.
This one from Degrees in Idealism – I actually know Elizabeth personally. She’s an amazing mother and friend. I get super excited whenever she posts. I know before clicking that I am going to love reading her take on whatever she decides to write about!
… and lastly
This one from In Honor of Design – I have followed this blog for a while. I am pretty sure I found it on Pinterest a few years ago. Not only is it visually stunning in regards to the photography and design (hence the name), but there is a lot of depth and thought that goes into the posts. It is such a well rounded blog probably because if I had to guess, Anna is a well rounded person!